Mon Oct 28 '24 Announcement
20 days ago – Mon, Oct 28, 2024 at 02:41:32 PM

It’s all over. The dust has fallen. A single top hat rolls across the proverbial battlefield....

We’ve just seen through one of IndieGoGo’s most successful campaigns of 2024, and that’s genuinely no small feat. Amongst seas of tech projects and folding bicycles and gadgets, you guys have chosen to pledge to support an independent business producing fan merchandise for three of our favourite cartoons. 

That means the world to us. We haven’t only designed things for you - we’ve designed things because we want to see them brought to life, we wanted an opportunity to tell a fun little story, and we wanted to see something super cool that you simply can’t get anywhere else - offering you that chance to bring your favourite cartoon heroes into something tangible and grounding. 

And here we are. 

While it’s not been plain sailing - thanks to corporate monsters and platform failures - we’re immensely proud to see such a big number and see just how many hundreds of you are going to be receiving our incredible collectables in July 2025. 

We’re so, so thankful to all of you for your passion, your love for these characters and - of course - your support for us. It’s genuinely so exciting to know we’re bringing over 8,000 animation collectables into the world. That’s how many items from the campaign we’ve sold. Isn’t that crazy?!

Now that it’s all over, the real fun begins!

The campaign is closed? What about InDemand?

The campaign is indeed now closed to pledges. Our original intention was to run the campaign on InDemand, but IndieGoGo has proven… ‘difficult’. From day one we’ve been navigating around the website’s foibles and having to do a lot of convoluted stuff (like tons of emails) to make it work. 

It’s become very clear that to offer the most accessible, easy-to-use option for people to finalise their orders, addresses, and add more items without paying extreme shipping fees, we’re going to need a little help - so we’re moving to our friends at Backerkit. 

What’s Backerkit?

Backerkit is our regular partner for post-campaign stuff. It sends out surveys to backers so you can finalise your orders, finalise your addresses and add any further items you want (without paying double shipping or having to mess around with perk links.)

However, more importantly for those who wanted to back or didn’t have cash during the campaign, it turns our crowdfunder into an on-demand pre-order store, which allows anybody to buy items from the campaign. 

Do I need to do anything?

Just keep an eye on your emails! We'll let you know when everything's ready. Until then, take a breather and put your feet up - you've earned it!

How long will this take?

We need to wait for IndieGoGo to hand us the money so we can get everything organised with Backerkit. This usually takes about two weeks - so you’ve plenty of time to scrape your cash together and get ready!

How long will Backerkit run for?

We’re expecting to run Backerkit for a month. 

Will Backerkit items get sent out at the same time?

If you’re already a backer, your items will still be aiming for a July 2025 arrival date.

If you’ve not backed on the IndieGoGo campaign, your items will be arriving in August 2025. This is our ‘last wave’ of items. 

What’s this I hear about new figures?

You guys completely blew us away on our last day of the campaign, and our poor artists couldn’t keep up. So when Backerkit launches, we’ll be introducing two further stretch goals. This is a super exciting duo that we know many will be very excited for. 

We’re going to be introducing the hambone king and legendary engineer, Fiddleford Hadron McGucket (in his first EVER vinyl figure!) and a particularly intimidating version of Emperor Belos - who we’re introducing as none other than Kaiju Belos. 

We’re working on these designs now and they’re making amazing progress!

What else will be on Backerkit?

All items from the campaign will be live and available, along with some of our backstock of The Owl House and Gravity Falls collectables. We’ve been listening to your requests for certain items and we’re pretty sure we’ve got the most popular ones written down!

What if I need to modify my address later on?

We’re ready and waiting to help with any address changes post-Backerkit, and will be able to facilitate these as late as June 2025. Please make sure you contact us as soon as you’re certain of your new shipping address, and we’ll get on it as soon as we can!

And what’s happening now?

Our utterly amazing 3D artist, Kelly, is getting the renders done for every single item in the campaign, which we’ll be revealing over the next couple of weeks in the lead-up to Backerkit. We’re also going to be finalising designs according to feedback, so remember to keep giving us your thoughts as we go!

—

Once again, we really can’t thank you enough. Whether you’ve ordered six of everything, just got a keychain, or simply posted fanart for our silly storyline on Twitter, we’ve been amazed by your enthusiasm. You’ve made our final campaign an utterly enormous success, and we think this is the best send-off Studio Bad Egg could ever hope for. 

We totally get you might have some further questions - please keep posting them on the campaign page! I’ll try my best to get through as many as I can. Do be patient though, I’m only one guy!

We’ll be updating you all with every significant update along the way right here, so please make sure you’re receiving our emails, and keep checking in. There are a lot of components to this campaign and we’re very eager to make sure you know exactly where we are at all times.

Much love,

Studio Bad Egg

Sat Oct 26 '24 Announcement
21 days ago – Sat, Oct 26, 2024 at 07:04:17 PM

Bill’s bruised eye finally opened, blearily. His head - although, let’s be fair, he was 99% ‘head’ - was still lost in a sickening Wurlitzer of confusion, dizziness and robot-induced migraine. What he saw his targets doing made every inch of him run cold. 

Every single one of them had assembled on a giant, adapted Cipher wheel - drawn hurriedly onto the floor. It had meant throwing half of Richmond’s furniture around, and the sofa was positively ruined, but it seemed that Studio Bad Egg was now serving a higher purpose. 

“Do you just carry a chalk marker in your pocket?” Luz murmured as Ford drew out the circle. 

“It’s actually a salt marker,” Ford replied, not even glancing up from his task. “When you’ve dealt with as many incantations and summoning circles as I have, it becomes a necessity.” 

“I spent my thirties chasin’ chicks and bein’ chased by cops, this guy spent his thirties summonin’ demons and talkin’ to some sorta cyclops geometric shape with separation anxiety.” Stan sniffed indignantly, as if being chased by cops or chasing chicks was in any way an honorable pursuit. 

“That’s really reductive,” Ford murmured, finishing off the enormous de-summoning circle. “Right. Let’s do this.” 

Anne took in the baffling display. An enormous dartboard design, with a symbol of each of the misled souls currently crammed into the little studio. “Dude, we have symbols now?”

“I may have taken a few artistic liberties. Now come, everybody join in - hold hands.” 

“I don’t have any hands, hoot-hoot!” 

“I’m afraid you’ll have to stand aside, uh…Owl tube.” 

“Can I eat the triangle now?”

“No. Just stand aside.”

“I’ll keep you company, hoot!” Came the chipper reply, as Hooty rested his head on Ford’s shoulder to oversee proceedings. Ford had come upon a lot of things in his life, but the sensation of a high-pitched worm-demon with a cutesy owl face resting on his shoulder was uniquely unpleasant. 

But in the name of the greater good… he allowed it. Begrudgingly. 

Slowly, reluctantly - and gingerly, thanks to their disbelief… every one of them linked hands. Sasha even held hands with Mabel, and that girl’s hands were sticky as hell with some kinda strawberry-scented sugar residue. She had no idea what ‘Mabel Juice’ was and with a name like that, she really didn’t want to know. 

“Okay, we’ve all got the script?” 

Dipper distributed it accordingly, popping little pieces of paper into every member of the crew’s hands. And to Hooty, who promptly swallowed it as further evidence he shouldn’t be allowed to take part in any organised effort. 

The delirious Bill shakily stood to his feet, a slab falling from his exoskeleton and clattering to the floor. He held his head with a groan and quickly realised what was happening. 

“WAIT. WAIT! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!”

He scrambled to the portal as fast as he could - though it was, in this instance, more of a dazed stagger. He immediately grabbed for the one closest to the rapidly weakening portal ahead of him - which, unlucky for him, was Polly. 

Frobo kicked into life immediately - and despite his instructions not to, his protection of Polly more or less sat above every priority on the planet. His two vialed battery packs hissed into life, turbines wound, hydraulics whistled…

“P O L L Y .” 

C R U N C H !

The protective strike was even harder than the one that had nearly sent Bill through the wall of his cell - and was struck in such a way that it threatened to disassemble every one of his molecules. Bill was sent flying skyward, his exoskeleton cracking and shattering like fine china.

The impact flashed with a brilliant blue light. The portal fizzed and crackled aggressively, whirling like a Catherine wheel with ever-increasing progression. 

“Dear God,” Ford murmured. “EVERYBODY! NOW!”

Every one of them - Eda, Luz, Lilith, Stan, Ford, Dipper, Mabel, Wendy, McGucket, Soos, Marcy, Sasha, Anne, Hop Pop and Polly all recited at the top of their lungs… (and only stumbled a little bit. Reverse text is kinda hard to read, y’know?)

 L - T - O - L - O - X - A

Dluow eh dias eh kcab emac eh

Doog oot tsuj sgninrub kniht ew

Lla su yas os rewop eht ekove

Llat dnats esrevitlum eht tel!

The entire circle began to light. It throbbed under their feet, crackling and buzzing like the golden shell that had once protected Bill Cipher. The noise became unbelievable. Every piece of glass in Bad Egg HQ shattered into pieces. Every mug in Hop-Pop’s precious cupboard burst into shrapnel.

They each felt themselves rising off of the ground, yelping in surprise and flailing as they tried to catch their balance in an invisible wave of what could only be described as pure energy. 

Then, they fell back to the floor. 

Silence took over. A pregnant pause that throbbed in the ears almost as heavily as the invisible waves of pure, multidimensional energy that had surrounded them. It was as if every single being on the planet had frozen in time, waiting to see what would happen. 

Nobody could have quite predicted what would happen next. 

A giant, glimmering, almost glittering pink amphibious foot - with webbed toes - slammed down into Bill Cipher’s cell, and roamed the concrete floor awkwardly - until it came upon the now practically desiccated demon that sat in the centre. 

It was followed by a black, near-visionless, beady eye - attached to an equally gargantuan, smooth, expressionless head, racked with bright red gills that seemed to flow and eminent eternally, giving glimpses into lands unknown and undiscovered. 

It was none other than the Big Frilly himself. A beast of such eternal burden, of eternal knowledge, and eternal ends - unbridled by tank and shore.

His voice echoed through the room, a soft, velvet tone that felt grand and all-knowing while remaining inimitably naive and genteel. The voice of an all-seer that could, by irony of his form, see relatively little. 

Perhaps most notable of all, though, it was a voice that spoke almost exclusively in rhyme.

Such a shame,
I was quite sure,
Bill Cipher’s treatment would endure,
I thought we'd made such progress, too.
I guess that simply wasn't true...

Bill, my silly evil friend,
You've earned yourself a sticky end.
All this chance to make things right,
And yet you refuse to see the light.

I’ll take you to another room,
And secure your shards into a tomb.
Three-thousand-odd fragments left behind,
The remnants of your broken mind.

Every one of these pieces,
Will remain when this story ceases,
Locked within eternal air...
A sarcophagus will hold them there. 

Each hero can take a fragment home,
Within their prison, they shan’t roam.
A punishment for Bill’s great misdeeds…
A patient that shall not be freed.

You all must now return to your lands,
And free yourself from Cipher’s Hands.
But I hope before you all take flight,
You remember that it’s always right…

…To work together, worlds of three,
Titans, Family and Fighters, you see,
The power within you all, my friends,
Is what brought this chaos to an end.

With a flash of light, the hand took away Bill’s dazed body - and that terrible fizzing portal into Theraprism’s depressing fauxcrete box slammed shut. A miniature sarcophagus appeared at everyone’s feet - each one containing a swarming speckle of their adversary, silently cursing and swearing from within his eternal chamber. 

“Welp, that was terrifying!” Stan murmured in disbelief, taking into account the fact he’d basically seen the head newt of the universe. “What, do we make a church for this guy?”

“I feel like everything in the world has changed…without actually affecting the Boiling Isles,” Eda murmured. She clutched Luz’s shoulder as she stared, contemplatively, at the whispering remains of what had once been a portal into an interdimensional asylum. 

Mabel was innocent to the existential crises that the scene had manifested and was preoccupied with shaking her sarcophagus with brutal glee. “I’m gonna put mine in Waddles’ litterbox!” 

Hooty swallowed his whole before he even contemplated the fact it was a living demon in a block of resin. Luz’s eyes shrank to pindots, but she figured it best not to say anything. 

Stable portals to each of our heroes’ realms opened up, peacefully humming and offering their route back to the places in which they belonged. These were night and day compared to the rips in space-time that had brought them there.

They felt homey. Inviting. A warm, soft slow from each of them. A reminder that they all had a place of belonging - that had, thankfully, remained quite untouched by the reality-bending misadventure.

It was hard, all the same, not to feel emotional at the fact the endeavour - as exhausting, bizarre and scary as it had been - ending. 

They all exchanged a glance and smiled. While crossing paths may have been a headache - and each of the worlds had their differences - it was hard to deny they had the same heroism, spirit of adventure and sheer heart in common. 

“That was totally awesome!” Marcy shouted excitedly, before almost slipping on the salt that surrounded them on the floor as she bounded to celebrate with the cast of misfits she had crossed by sheer chance. 

“You guys are the best!” Luz squealed, making an effort to hug every single one of them. Even the frog who smelt like mothballs. 

“Guys? Guys! Can somebody get me off of this old guy’s back already?!”

Everybody exchanged a glance, only to realise that Stanford Pines still had a bright pink frog strapped to his back. Once the exchange had been completed, heads had been counted and everybody had gingerly pocketed their weird little encapsulated Bill Cipher, it was time to go. 

Hugs were exchanged. The odd little tear was shed. Friendly punches on the arm were exchanged. Weapons admired and photographs taken.

And finally, with a deep breath…

Every single one of these most fabulous of heroes stepped back through their portals…

“You know, guys…this would be an awesome comic book.”

“Marcy, I love ya…but nobody would buy that.”

The portals closed up, never again to open - and at last, the Bad Egg Studio fell silent. Bill Cipher had returned to solitary confinement, a thousand remnants, teeming inside ritualistic boxes, left behind.

Richmond looked around and groaned, holding his forehead as he took in the broken glassware, the shattered mugs, the discarded furniture and the scattered salt on the floor. 

With a deep sigh, he picked up the dustpan and brush, and got to work.

No more.

No more cartoons, for a very long time. 

~ FIN ~

Written by Jordan 'Grunkle Jam' Mooney
Conceived by Richmond Parakhen
Based upon figure concepts designed by Kyri45
Most definitely not canon!

Wed Oct 23 '24 Announcement
25 days ago – Wed, Oct 23, 2024 at 11:56:53 AM

As promised, we're hard at work progressing the collection behind the scenes, and we've just got our first render of Brass Tacks Stan! This is the very first 3D capture of our beloved Grunkle, and while a few changes are required, we're sure you'll agree he's already looking incredible

So, what's going to change?

We can see clearly now the rain is gone...
We're going to be reworking Stan's glasses to be more accurate to his series design - we should have seen this coming really, as lineart and 'actually this is just a black frame' is always a little difficult to communicate with 3D renders. This will also make the arms of his specs much less intrusive on the lenses and frame his stubble more accurately to the show.

Who gave him toothpaste?
Stan doesn't have shiny white gnashers. Very important to get that natural Grunkle-Stank, even in his own image. Fans will know we're working off of Stan's fantasy of himself in Land Before Swine so we're using this as a basis throughout!

Stan, your tattoo is leaking.
There's a couple of texture errors on his torso, particularly on those GLISTENING ABS. This is super rudimentary and will not be present on the finished figure, so don't worry. We're working on tight deadlines and none more so than our amazing independent art team.

What's staying the same?

G I R T H
Remember - Stanley is a full 8" tall, and is going to be one broad-shouldered fella. We plan to keep those glistening, adonis-esque proportions so he's perfectly in scale with his dorky brother.

What's next?

Now we've got a full view of how Stan will look, we can finalise his design. The changes we need for him are incredibly minor and don't include any complicated things like Infinity Mirrors and totally-not-real-portals-to-other-dimensions, so we expect this to be a pretty smooth journey to completion.

Never say never, though. Plenty can happen once these babies hit the factory, and we'll be sure to update you of any further changes.

Our amazing 3D Modeller Kelly is being pushed to the limits and we hope you're all as in love with her work as we are. We can't wait to see this man stand before us in the flesh.

...And it's a lot of flesh.

Remember, Brass Tacks Stan is available NOW to preorder, but you only have a few more days to pick him up! At $180USD, we're content he's plenty of man for your money.

...And what a man.

Sat Oct 19 '24 Announcement
29 days ago – Sat, Oct 19, 2024 at 10:43:02 AM

Well, we've got HUGE news today, as the very first Ford Pines figurine has been sampled by the factory and assembled. This is a massive milestone in the campaign and a great proof of concept for what we're capable of.

This is a pre-revision Ford Pines, so the face has already undergone resculpting (including a redesign of his glasses and lips) and the colour scheme is mostly proof of concept as opposed to representative of the finished product.

So, what's going to change?

Skin tone and colouring
Ford is looking a little too Goth for our tastes, so we're getting him to a tanning salon and lightening up his hair and features to bring him a little more Grunkle energy instead of 'kid outside Hot Topic'.

Facial sculpt
This is a pre-revision Ford, based upon our initial design. We've already reworked his lips, facial shape and glasses - the latter is particularly important for us as the eyebrows on this sample simply don't fit the character's design.

What's staying the same?

Size and scale
I mean, look at him. He's glorious - a full 8" tall makes for a very bulky figure, and we reckon this sample will really display just how much figure you're getting for your cash.

The Infinity Mirror
We're content that this was perfected right out of the gate. We're super proud of how it turned out and just how bright the LEDs are shining!

What's next?

Sampling is a super long process, and the moment this one began production, we began production on the second version. This is to help us work out what works and what doesn't, and for those of you who haven't seen us at work before, it's really fascinating! As a result we're hoping to keep you up to date as this progresses.

Our amazing 3D Modeller Kelly is also hard at work on producing renders of our other figurines, which we're hoping to publish before the campaign ends.

For now, bask in the greatness! The majesty! The slightly off-colour glory!

Fri Oct 18 '24 Announcement
29 days ago – Fri, Oct 18, 2024 at 04:33:47 PM

If you've already preordered an item from the BYEEE campaign, please check your emails for a secret link to your latest add-ons. This will unlock a reduced shipping rate for the incredible 8" tall Frobo - with two alternative cabins (featuring Soos and Kikimora) and a race-car accessory - not to mention the legendary B-Rat Keychain commemorating the campaign.

This will allow you to add other items from the campaign thus far, too!

We've got something AMAZING planned, but we need to hit $750k to unlock - and only a little over a week to achieve such a magical number. Think we can do it? Please spread the word of the campaign far and wide!

---

The inhabitants of all three worlds could only back off cautiously as the demon swelled to thirteen times his usual size, clearly infuriated beyond belief by the honest attempts at owl-based friendship.

Even Hooty coiled back, taking serious offence at Bill's reaction to his dance of peace and love.

“We’re no longer friends! Hoot!” 

“I DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS!”

“Well you definitely don’t now!” Hooty retorted, haughtily, before horking up a thick green globule of corrosive spit and flinging it at his invalidated buddy-prospect. 

Bill sneered, leered over the demon's be-beaked head and pulled back his fist...

THWHUMP!

…Only for a much, much harder punch to pound into him so hard that the giant interdimensional criminal's body almost split in two. Sparks flew, shards of his golden exoskeleton flying skywards. Indeed, this colossal thump not only stopped his advance in his tracks - it sent him flying backwards against his damp, mossy Theraprism wall, where we smacked against the fauxcrete with a sickening crunch!

He groaned, shrank back down to size instantly and propped himself up dizzily on one arm, only to find a larger-than-ever crack in his exoskeleton and a purple hue taking over his usually golden eyelids. 

“Son of a…”

Suddenly, the delirious dream-demon seemed much less eager to break into the world. Although, to be fair, right now his legs were lacking enthusiasm for standing. He slumped back against the wall dizzily and adjusted his hat. He hadn’t felt a punch like that…well, ever. 

After all, that fist wasn’t merely the fist of Stan Pines - he had memorised that punch for the entirety of his life since. 

No, the fist he had been so suddenly introduced to was gigantic, metallic, and picked out in a fetching shade of frost white and Polly pink. 

Ford, Dipper and Stan stood aside, mouth agape, while Mabel gasped with her hands clasped over her rosy cheeks. Eda, Lilith and Luz stared blankly. The Amphibia crew, meanwhile, weren’t even particularly surprised by robots anymore. 

“Step back, nacho-man! Frobo…uh… 2.50 is here!” came the chirp of a tiny little pink polliwog.

“Dude, ain’t we kinda 3.0? I mean, these upgrades? Hardcore.” added an all-too familiar voice, crunching on a bag of chips as if standing alongside a giant demon-punching frog-bot was part of his day to day. 

“Don’t argue with the engineers, Soos.”

The handyman, stained with abomination fluid, chuckled as he took another mouthful. “Look, Wendy, let’s be real. This is the second time we got a giant robot to punch this guy. I think I know what I’m talking about, bro. Also, these Thai chips? Awesome, bro.”

Fiddleford Hadron McGucket was less interested in the classification of the robot, and more interested in celebrating the ultimate innovation in the latest iteration of the enormous automaton. “Ah went an’ filled his back-pipes with emperor goop!”

Wendy rubbed the bridge of his nose - something that Polly eagerly mimicked. “Fidds. Please never…never say that again.” 

The still distinctly unhinged hillbilly merely bounded proudly to the robot’s side, slapping a ‘Refueled by McGucket’ sticker onto the screeching tank of decrepit witch-hunter slime with an overabundance of enthusiasm. 

“Dear Titan.” Eda murmured. “That’s beyond horrific.”

“I almost feel bad.” Luz agreed. “...Almost.”

“Ah wouldn’t go a-worryin’ too much! This feller ain’t got no pain receptors! He’s just a wigglin’ battery!” McGucket retorted, dancing for reasons known only to him. 

“Gotta say, it was totally gnarly squeezing the guy into the capsule. The purple blob thing was given to us by some cute pink-haired witch with a cat on her shoulder.” Wendy grinned, tipping her oil-stained ushanka with a large monkey wrench. “Said something about saying hi to a sweet potato.” 

Luz flushed a vibrant pink, but decided not to comment. Somehow saying ‘I’m the sweet potato’ seemed really inappropriate in a moment containing a giant robot.

Ford was unsurprised at McGucket’s insane level of genius...but the dedication of Soos, Wendy and Polly had come as a bit of a shock. “How did you…?”

“We figured we’d need something really big, really strong and totally magical to beat the triangle’s hiney. So while all of you guys were messing around, we sorta dove back into space and time to find some supplies. And grabbed Frobo.” Polly beamed. “It was super simple! All I had to do was set up a multiversal circuit board with a magical capacitor interface and a miniature bile sack-”

"Turns out this magic stuff is like stuffing a nuclear reactor into a Tickle-Me-Emo." Wendy agreed. "That punch wasn't even full strength."

"Ah drew th'theoretical physics on the back of a bean can!" Fiddleford interjected, to absolutely nobody's surprise. 

“Genius.” Ford murmured, tapping his lip. “This purple tadpole creature is clearly of enormous intellect. I may have to take a sample.”

“Wait, what? A sample of what?!”

Hop-Pop emerged from the cupboard, took in the ensuing chaos, and quietly opted to return to the cupboard. Not today.

Mabel, Sasha and Luz were a little less interested in the technobabble. Instead, they peered into the flickering portal, to see Bill Cipher - sitting there, hat askew, exoskeleton fractured, and eye bruised. 

“Man. You guys TOTALLY messed him up.”

“Sweetie, don’t feel bad for him.” Stan smiled, ruffling her hair. “He got what he deserved.”

“I don’t feel bad. Punch him again!” Mabel beamed. 

Frobo heard her and got ready to do exactly that.

P o l l y? The hulking technicoloured machine buzzed, turning to his little pink compatriot. 

“Yeah, hit ‘im where it hurts, Frobo!” 

His robotic features locked up into a wide, perhaps even slightly sadistic grin, and his enormous fist raised. The bubbling of abomination-and-Belos goop batteries began to echo around the room. Hydraulic hoses hissed, and lights illuminated…

“Now, hold onto yer banjo-strings!” McGucket interrupted, diving into the path of the robot’s two-ton punch. “This ain’t no pug-fightin’ game we’re playin’! Why, if we go a-puncherin’ all-over again through space an’ time, we could end up offsettin’ the entire balance’a the universe!”

"Did he just say pug-fighting?" Marcy murmured into Anne's ear. Anne merely nodded sagely.

“Quite right.” Ford added, solemnly. “We’ve got to find another solution.” 

“You remember how this joker’s demonic book explained he’s in some kinda therapy dimension dealio being watched over by a big newt or somethin'?” Stan said, in an almost frighteningly casual nature while rubbing his nose.
“When I was in a Colombian prison and we were sick of wrestling with a guy, we just kinda called the warden so he’d get beaten round back. Why ain't we just calling this guy's guard or somethin'?"

“Wait! Wait! I noted something down!” Dipper beamed, diving into the blue pine-tree journal he had started using for his adventures. “Grunkle Stan used to say all of this in his sleep!”

“I’m not sure I like where this is going.” Ford said, sternly.

“No, haha, don’t worry. I only wrote the useful bits. The rest will haunt me. Forever.” A tense pause overtook the teenager briefly as he spaced out into a particularly darkened corner of his mind. “...Forever.”

He cleared his throat and continued leafing through his notes. Witch-circles, fairy-circles, chuck-e-cheese-circles, spells, incantations, the ingredients to a popsicle that he was sure contained anthrax, his own attempt at decoding Yumberjack’s secret sauce…

“Whoa, do you, like, have some kinda Necronomicon or something?” Sasha peered over his shoulder with interest - much to Dipper's surprise and rapid loss of composure.

“Oh, Dipper here, he messes around with some crazy stuff.” Wendy said, leaning over his other shoulder, which really wasn't helping the situation. “This lil’ dude’s seen everything from zombie invasions to the FBI.”

Sasha grinned. Though admittedly, her interest seemed rather taken by the oil-stained flannel-wearing redhead rather than the kid whose book she was glancing at. 

...Perhaps another time.

Dipper tugged on his collar, blushing a bright red and now taken over with a different form of tense silence entirely. It lifted with only a nervous smile as he leafed through the Pine Tree journal trying to find the incantation that his Grunkle so often recited in his sleep…

Finally, he found the page, and grinned.

“If I’m not wrong, we just gotta do a little rewriting.” 

If Bill Cipher was not nursing a rather painful black eye and trying to stop his cell spinning around him, he would have no doubt been quick to protest the intuitive twin’s intentions.

And by the time he would realise…

It would already be too late!